All I Want For Xmas Is Your Skull (2020 Demo)

by harlequin's shadow

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about

Sometimes I see memes that amuse me. And then frustrate me, because some of them imply a promise in the meme that isn’t delivered upon.

One of those has been floating around my head for... well, let's just say I work somewhat slowly. It’s fairly obvious meme – a picture of Mariah Carey and Glenn Danzig, coming together for a Xmas song – “All I Want for Christmas Is Your Skull.”

And I chuckled. Because it’s funny. But it’s less funny when said meme doesn’t link to anything that satisfies the desire to hear a song like that. Later, I saw that someone did a mashup... but it was no Snickers... it failed to satisfy.

So I wrote one myself. I almost wanted to do a parody, but I opted instead for a pastiche. Combed through Danzig’s lyrics. Listened to some of my favorite Danzig songs.

And this is the result. My Danzig voice is nowhere near his. The guitars are a mixture of Danzig, Misfits, Motorhead, and rockabilly. The song is Mariah Carey-free.

But damn it if this little ditty doesn’t amuse the fuck outta me.

lyrics

All I Want for Xmas (Is Your Skull)

When the long dark night of winter solstice comes
I’m gonna sit by the yuletide fire
As the snow drifts down, the wolves howl as one
And in my heart is a funeral pyre

When the long dark night of winter solstice comes
I’m gonna sit by the yuletide fire
As the snow drifts down, the wolves howl as one
And in my heart is a funeral pyre

It’s the Saturnalia, With the gifting and the feasts
I’m a devil of a Krampus, Gonna be your Xmas beast
So I’ll troll out my song, Drinking wassail to your fear
I need the man in red to bring my Xmas cheer

(chorus)
All I want for Xmas is your skull
I wanna drink eggnog and rum in your skull
All I want for Xmas is your skull
Whoa oh, whoa ohhh

I’ll deck the halls with bones ‘n holly, Hang my stockings by the flames
You’re the number one, Atop my list of evil names
Now the slaying bells are ringing, They are calling for your head
It’s a dark no(h)el in the silent night of dread

(chorus)
All I want for Xmas is your skull
I wanna drink eggnog and rum in your skull
All I want for Xmas is your skull
Whoa oh, whoa ohhh

All I want for Xmas is your skull
In the pale moonlight on the blood red snow
All I want for Xmas is your skull
See it hanging underneath the mistletoe
All I want for Xmas is your skull
By the bright crimson light from Rudolph’s nose
All I want for Xmas is your skull
So I can drink red wine with the Xmas ghosts
All I want for Xmas is your skull
All I need for Xmas is your skull

When the long dark night of winter solstice comes
I’m gonna sit by the yuletide fire

credits

released December 19, 2020

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about

harlequin's shadow Muncie, Indiana

Emerging from the mind of the sometime musical/creative partner of Comedy Rock Star, Mikey Mason, harlequin’s shadow is the creative outlet of an autistic English professor, actor, and all-around dabbler in things creative. Though literature, games, fantasy, and geeky things are part and parcel of harlequin’s shadow, it is also the result of decades of original music finally being recorded. ... more

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